One of the strange things I realised on reflection is that I always consider myself an average painter. The issue is that I have been an average painter for the last ten years - but if you look at my original blood bowl teams to my latest T-55's there is a definite improvement.
So I'm back with one of my rambling pieces, and it's about something which has been circulating in my head for some time. The idea about being 'average'. Now I've chosen to focus on painting, but it applies in so many other areas too gaming, list building etc.
The thing is that painting is very subjective, I can look at two peoples work and say 'I think this one is better than that one' but equally someone else may disagree. With my own work over the last decade or so though I'm able to say that there has been an improvement, comparing initial FoW stuff to my latest stuff I see a very definite improvement. But I still compare myself to those around me (as do most people) and I feel that there are those who are better, those who are worse, and that doesn't seem to change, therefore I'm a rather average painter.
But I've got better (subjectively) so does that mean I'm still average? Now average is a huge area, so am I now better than average? On a good day yes, on a bad day no... Same with my gaming I think.
But I realise the more I go on, it doesn't matter if I'm average or great, or useless. What matters to me is that I have improved, that I can use materials and techniques I couldn't have done previously, and the more I use them, the better the result. It's a fairly liberating feeling not comparing myself to others, and more to myself.
And do you know what, even objectively now I'm beginning to think that maybe, I'm better than average.